Touring the Peloponnese
Eager to see more of the glorious Greek countryside, Spud ventured out of the ancient city of Athens to explore the spoils of the Mediterranean coast. To get there, Spud would need to travel south to the large outcropping known as the Peloponnese.
The Peloponnese was once connected to the north of Greece at the antediluvian city of Corinth. Today the city is separated from the north by a 4 mile long 75 foot wide canal. While the locals say the canal was built to allow for safer passage of boats, Spud knows the real reason...
The Corinthian's have always been revered for their fine leather bucket seats. In fact, a number of years ago there was a massive demand for the automotive seats from the Chrysler corporation who were installing them in their 1978 Cordobas. This huge demand for Corinthian leather pushed the product past the olive industry to become Greece's largest export. This infuriated the country's Olive growers and they set out to destroy Corinth and anyone there who looked like Chrysler spokesman Ricardo Montalban. The Corinthians became wise to this planned attack and set out to cut themselves off from the crazed northerners, A couple thousand sticks of dynamite later, the Corinth Canal was born and the Corinthian leather industry was saved. It proved to be a lost cause though, as sales of the Cordoba plummeted shortly afterward when buyers learned how crappy the cars were.
The next stop on the itinerary was the Sanctuary of Epidavros - a therapeutic and religious center dedicated to the healing god Aklepios. In the sanctuary lies another great amphitheater built in the 4th century. The unique feature of this open air auditorium is it's near perfect acoustics which Spud tested out by playing a few Yanni hits on his mandolin. Apparently the music was indeed therapeutic as he was soon drowned out by snoring tourists.
Spud's journey concluded with a visit to the mountainous Mesa Mani region of the Peloponnese. This area was known as 'the Land of Evil Counsel' as its inhabitants were notorious for plundering visitors when olive production was out of season. Legend has it that the locals, crazed with withdrawal, would ambush hapless foreigners, wrestle them to the ground and force pimentos into every orifice. Fortunately, Spud was rescued by one of the more stable residents before he became an accessory in a martini.
After a filling meal of souvlaki smothered in feta, a slice of baklava and a half bottle of ouzo, it was time to pack up and head home.